Unshead · Tears

Livejournal used to be awesome. About a year ago. Now no one posts shit on here. Thats why im saying goodbye to my Livejournal. Myspace is better. And this is pointless.

This weekend has been great, well actually since Thursday i guess. I finally got a good grade on something which made me feel a lot better about myself and whatever and Brandon finally e-mailed me back just when i had given up on him lol I was happy. This weekend at work was fine, i did pretty good in tips which i needed, i got moms watch engraved for her anniversay and i finally met with my mammaw to get some pictures for my scrapbook that im making for them. I decided not to do anything tonight instead i stayed home and watched a movie with my mom it was fun im glad i stayed home even though i am bored right now and really wanting to be out of the house but oh well its too late to go anywhere. So anyways: I'm gonna go for now i don't have much else to say Peace!

So things are looking up in ways. Kyle Woosley called me the other night and gave me some advice on college and something else in general, its good to know that he went through what im feeling now and it always helps me to talk to someone about stuff like that because i can tell he actually listens and cares about whats going on in my head, some of the things he told me last night made me feel so good about myself as a person and thats what i needed because for the past few weeks i have been putting myself down a lot. So a big thanks to Kyle. Also a big thanks to you Corey T. for listening to me bitch a lot, i know its rough but thanks for putting up with me. I was supposed to "spend the night with cheech" tonight but im not going to because i would feel to much like a third wheel if i did because it would be the three of us. Gavin was supposed to go but he can't b/c he has class tomorrow and stuff so oh well i needed to stay home and catch up on some more homework anyways. I've been e-mailing someone over the past few days or so and ive began to wonder if he is going to e-mail me back or not. Anyways...Works not so bad i guess as long as i keep to myself and not let things or people get on my nerves, usually if i think about something else while im at work and we get busy it takes my mind off getting mad. last friday i thought about that blanket that sue made me this friday who knows probabally some of the things woo said to me. its small things that people do or say that keep me going. Or maybe i'll sing, that takes my mind off of the things at work too. i guess this is good enough of an update for now. Atleast its better than the few that have been before this one.

I have a lot of other things that i could and should be doing right now like reading a book that i have to answer some questions over or studying for a psy. test that i have tuesday and maybe writing some notes down on my cheat sheet that i get to use in History, but i decided that this sounded more interesting to do. Lately i have been kind of depressed, it seems like nothing is changing anymore and everyday is the same. I wake up after not really getting enough sleep to be rested, either go to school, watch t.v. or get ready for work. At work the same people come in and eat and order the same things and complain about the same litle stuff..."the coffee is to cold... The mashed potatoes are like soup....this sure isin't much food...." and the everyday question of.."are you and christina twins!?" Ugh, but i guess the constant complaining and same faces is somethign that i am going to have to deal with. Just smile, get them what they want and ignore any rude comments or same repetetive complaint that i get.
Anyways...I think that the weather is what has put me in a depressed mood, its cold outside and i know that soon it will be winter and even though i love autumn and the cool almost prefect weather, i know that winter is just around the corner and i know that it will be freezing outside soon, relationships also get me down in the winter time because it always seems like i am single in the winter when i want someone around me the most. Guess i'll have to deal with that too because it doesnt seem like i am going to be having a boyfriend anytime soon, not to say that i exactly want a boyfriend, just someone to be with on the cold nights. *sigh* Enough about that...
Even though i have been in a depressed mood, (i guess thats what i can call it i don't know, just a sad mood i guess) the week is getting better and i am begining to get my good mood back. I ate lunch with Korey F. This afternoon after class, it was good to catch up on some gossip and get to see him since i hadn't actually hung out with him in a long time. (Thanks for inviting me to eat with you Korey! :)..) And this weekend i am suposed to be going to watch a movie with my other friend Corey, we have been planning to hang out for a while and i am excited to actually be doing somethign this weekend, though i want to get back in time to go to farmers and be with my friends there too.
School is boring and getting harder for me everyday. I'm still not sure what classes i am going to take next semester, i know i am taking english 102 (i think) at the high school on wednesday nights, CSI 100 ( i think...again) Math 109 and either biology, intro to music, my other history class, or anther humanaties class. Ill figure it out. I know that i am taking public speaking this summer though...thats for sure.
I am out of things to say for now and i doubt that i update for a few more days..weeks..months..who knows......Bye!

I was bored so i figured that i would update my journal since i haven't in a long time. Not to much has happened actually. Kyle and i broke up, decided that it was for the best since we never got to see eachother and whatever. But whatever....Work is normal except KaAnn quit today which was really sad, i am going to miss her on friday nights and saturday mornings, she is really the only one who seems liek they can actually get me to wake up and be in a good mood on Saturday mornings though today i was actually in a really good mood today, weird. But anyways.. things have been going pretty good lately and im pretty happy with all thats going on i guess thats all i can really say for now. Im heading out now and going to farmers for a bit to see my friends....bye!

Once again i get the feeling that it is pointless to even post on livejournal anymore because no one reads them, but ill do it anyways. It seems like i never have time to do anything but go to school, go to work and do my homework. It really sucks because i havent gotten to talk to a lot of my friends from high school in forever and i really miss some of them. I read a few journals on here liek Jordan's and Jason's and they make me sad and make me realise that i may never see some of my old friends again or atlast for a really long time.
Relationships have been a big issue with me lately. I know what i want out of a relationship but it seems like im not getting it. I havent really got to talk to Kyle lately and if we ever got to talk on the phone for more than 10 minutes at a time i would mention something about us, but he is always to tired to even talk sometimes so i don't even bother. I really want us to work out and i do try to make it work but it looks liek it is going no where and all this does is make me sad. I feel like i will never find that person who is for me. No, im not looking to find that person in the next month and be married by November, that would be crazy, i just want someone who i can be with and someone to be there for me. I know that Kyle has to work a lot and i understand that he needs the money and whatever, i guess that we just picked a bad time to start dating. Makes me sad. Who knows, mayeb we can still make this work...
I guess the point that i am trying to get accross is that i am feeling kind of left out lately in the whole issue of relationships.It seems like all of my friends or people that i have grown up with have found someone that they want to be with for the rest of thier lives or have found someone great to be with for the time being. I see how they are always with thier boyfriends or girlfirends and i want someone who i can be with too. Im glad that all my friends have found people to be with and people that they love but yea, i am jealous of them lol.
I guess that is enough about my boring problems for one day. Now its time to get started on studying for my tests tomorrow..ick.

So i guess that Kyle and i are a couple. it's never really been made official, but i think its obvious. I'm happy. I really like spending time with him because theres really never a dull moment. I hope that it works out, it looks like its going to and im glad.

School starts is a few weeks. The 15th and i am nervous still. I guess ill get over that fact. My computer has been messing up a lot lately so thats why i havent been able to update much and why i havent been online at all. If you need to talk call my cell...(287-3617)......Bye!

I haven't updated in a while and i really don't have that much to say but i am bored right now and this is the only thing that i can think of to do. I woke up late today because it looks so rainy and depresing outside that i decided to just stay in bed a while. I really hate rainy days like this sometimes because they are so boring and make me feel drained of what small amount of energy i have. I have been so lazy this summer. I was reading the paper the other day and i read where school starts back August 1st. Only a few short weeks away and to realise that i wont be getting up early that monday morning and heading back to the high school kinda depresses me and makes me realise what i am in store for. College. Yea its just ECC, but it is still going to be very hard for me. Yea, Im scared.

  Things are going good between me and Kyle. We still arent an official couple, i really dont want that to happen for a while because i want to get to know him. Everyone seems kinda happy taht we are talking except for a few people, but i can't let what they say bother me. Yea i was really nervous about talking to him and him liking me and everything because i was afraid of what it would mean for the future. But i don't need to be so scared of a relationship. I have been forever because i hate that fear of  "what if i get hurt..." Oh well if i get hurt, ill get over it. Im just going to do what is going to make me happy now...To Clarify, yea i do like him.